UH!!!!

a year,

thats how long i have

been thinking about you

not always 24/7, but A LOT

im tired of this but i dont kno how

to move on

im your puppet, i like being the master

puppeteer

..not the puppet

GET OUTTA MY HEAD CD!

OUTTA MY HEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

livid, pissed, upset, annoyed, irritable, vexed
i never knew you could make me feel like this
i never knew this is what would happen
but i should have seen the signs
the o so obvious signs of secrets, ditching, and posing.
not to mention the devilish act of selfishness and fake pride.
it pisses me off how its ok for you but not for anyone else
it pisses me off that i let it go this far
you piss me off
its as simple as that
so bugger off i dont care
im done

"Women are made to be loved, not understood."

"Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat."



"There's nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It's a thing no married man knows anything about."

I, I know what you did

Like a boy of summer gives his first kiss

Love, is dancing on my finger

He got to the heart of the matter and lingered

Now I'm walking with the living

I always liked Steinbeck and those old men whistling

We're back, we're back in San Francisco

We're back and you tell me I'm home

Talking in the Mission

Over coffee this is my utopia

Man, I'll be your lady

As the ocean rises, the sun is fading

And now I feel the ever after

Over red wine on the eve of summer

The buzz, the buzz of the city

As we settle in it's majesty

I, I know what you did

Like a boy of summer gives his first kiss

unveiling**

Nevermind what haters say, ignore them ’til they fade away.
Amazing they ungreat for after all the game I gave away.
Safe to say I paved the way, for you cats to get paid today.
You still be wasting days away, nah had I never saved the day.
Consider them my protégé, how much I think they should pay.
Instead of being gracious, they violated and made you wait.
I never been a hater still I love them, yeah I graze the way.
Some say they so yay and no they couldn’t even work on Labor day.
It aint that they black or white, their hands of area in shades of grey.
I’m West side anyway, even if I left the day it fades away.
Some move away to make a way not move away cause they afraid.
I’ll go back to the hood and all you ever did was hate away.
I pray for patience but they make me want to face away.
Like I once made them scream, now I could make them plead their case away.
Been thuggin’ all my life, can’t say I don’t deserve to take a break.
If you ever see me catch a case, and watch my future fade away.

much appreciated

thank you for making my fucking life
so much fucking worse.

your so selfish i cant even stand it
they keep telling me there is always people like you,
but i find it hard to believe that everyone else hasn't commited suicide

i have enough stress
i dont need you
fucking up my home life too

for fuck sakes just once in your
selfish little life
be considerate

fuck.

wild raquel bees; calgary; **night

Rushing and racing and running in circles

Moving so fast,

I'm forgetting my purpose

Blur of the traffic is sending me spinning

Getting nowhere

My head and my heart are colliding,

chaotic

Pace of the world

I just wish I could stop it

Try to appear like

I've got it together

falling apart

Save me

Somebody take my hand,

and lead me

Slow me down

Don't let love pass me by

Just show me how'

Cause I'm ready to fall

Slow me down

Don't let me live a lie

Before my life flys by

I need you to slow me down

Sometimes I fear that I might dissapear

In the blur of fast forward I faulter again

Forgetting to breathe,

I need to sleep getting nowhere

All that I've missed I see in the reflection

Passed me while I wasn't paying attention

Tired of rushing, racing and running

falling apart

Tell me

Oh won't you take my hand and lead me

Slow me down

Don't let love pass me by Just show me how'

Cause I'm ready to fall

Slow me down

Don't let me live a lie

Before my life flys by

I need you to slow me down

Just show me slow me down, slow me down

The noise of the world is getting me caught up

Chasing the clock and I wish I could stop it

Just need to breathe, somebody please

Slow me down

8:11/08

and thats why it didnt work out

...poor you

VOW

i have made a vow,
this vow i will try my all to keep.
i vow that no matter how big
my feelings are or get towards
human species of the opposite sex
i am not going to waste my precious
time on them.

i need to focus on school and getting better
at the tender (lol) age of sixteen
i have now concluded that i do not need a boyfriend
or even male interest

her name

soceity knows her as hope;
to her father she is fragile
and precious.
to her mother she is curious
and full of life.

to herself she is unknown.
she does not know what she is good at
she does not know how to spell
she does not know nothing of herself

but what she does know
is that she is who she is
and no one can say it is
right or wrong

no one can say whether it
is good or bad.

i wish i could be like hope,
child like in a way that i could do no wrong.
do nothing other then learn

wrong is not a word to her yet
i wish for this...
no words, no rights or wrongs
just experiences,
experiences

and hope

SOUP

i can only offer
my painted smile,

sometimes the pain

is just too much to bear.

no one knows the secrets

behind these empty eyes.

to be eternally happy,

is a treasure this world has never

and will never know.

i almost wonder if dear andy

was saying 'fuck critics, fuck the world'

and decided to see how far he could get

off a campbells soup can.

thats what i believe after all

his superstar died

in her prime.

how can i make it clear;

THIS IS WHAT I WANT

... do i have to spell it out for you too

.*.*.*--*.*.*.

to you time is just a hand

rotating;

to me its moments passing us by.

colours make life interesting,

but for me its expression and

individuality.

running keeps you fit,

it keeps me grateful

and sane.

wetness from above

we cry;
tears of joy
tears of sadness
tears of anger.
they fall from our eyes
and the skies

tears are ability
tears are nature
tears are what we are made of
we are them
they make us

cranium crash

ouch,
it's bruised,
swollen,
and aching.
no remedy but time.
time I dont wanna waste sitting
in the battle of tears.

family pushes for time,
coaches push for play.

heart pushes for neither.

in here, out there

trapt;

means city.

free is McCandless.

Krakauer is my escape.

here i am,
there you are.

come find me,

come save me.